Yes, this title was borrowed from Douglas Adams title of the third in the series of Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. When I am in deep thought or have a lot on my mind and am not in the mood to talk about it, my response when asked “What’s up?” is always, “Life, the universe, and everything.” It sums up things perfectly and this has how I have felt the majority of 2012. What a year and I for one am extremely happy it is almost over.
For the past five years I have thought about turning forty and was actually excited for January 2012 to happen. I couldn’t have been more wrong and did not see the emotional mind f-word that came along with it coming. It was able to sneak up on me and punch me in the gut and set my life spinning in a downward spiral. I have become one of those people who stress about everything: if I am doing enough for the blog, my career, my parenting, if I am a good enough wife, rights for all living creatures and how I have been able to screw up my life on so many levels over the years. When I was getting my hair done yesterday I was informed that I have a stress induced bald spot. In my thirties, I use to laugh at my 40 something friends for their anxiety attacks and now it’s pay back time. Anyone know of a natural remedy?
In February, with the Circle of Moms contest I was nominated for, I discovered quite a few blogs and spent some time reading them. Twelve days after her posting it, I read one of Bonzai Aphrodite’s final post and felt for her. At the same time I could feel myself becoming obsessed with my own blog and trying to live up to my own expectations, trying not to give into the fact that I work 50 + hours a week, while at the same time trying to be an active participant in my daughter’s life, making sure my husband and I stay engaged and have time for each other, starting my own company, homeschooling the little vegan and creating new recipes for the blog a couple of times a week. In the process of organizing all these elements I lost sight of the fact that I need sleep and sanity in order to accomplish anything.
As 2012 moved on there were numerous incidents that left me feeling all hope was gone. We had an unsuccessful Kickstarter, which had been hope for a new life and the possibility of a career that went hand in hand with our vegan lifestyle. Family and friends began calling me one of those crazies for my stand on animal rights along with the idea that I was “brainwashing” my child, even from those that believe in a plant-based diet for health reasons. I was basically told from someone close to me that my blog looked like crap and would never be successful due to my lack of professional looking pictures. I am reminded daily at how NOT technically savvy I am, trying to do something that is completely technical, which has become a handicap for this blog (if anyone is willing to trade classes on basic blog functions for awesome vegan meals let me know!) And then the worse thing for me, the inability to finish out the month of Vegan MOFO.
Before the 2011 MOFO even ended I had plans of what I was going to do for the next one. The idea for my theme changed monthly and I was so excited. During the course of the year my work schedule changed, leaving me with only my weekends to blog. I still hadn’t given up on my ability to do MOFO. I figured with the theme Ode to Vegan Bloggers, I couldn’t go wrong. Guess what, I was able to mess it up and unfortunately, even with my best intentions I wasn’t able to make it through the month.
Hey, but in this month of being Thankful I have to remember the great things that have happened this year that have made it possible to keep going. Who knew our vegan Girl Scout baking sale in lieu of selling cookies would have been so successful? Thanks for all those that supported, we will be doing it again this year! We have opened a lot of eyes to Veganism and the fact that it is not as hard as one might think, the food can be delicious and that it is a healthier lifestyle when done right. We have at least a thousand new friends joining us for the Don’t Fear the Vegan ride and the numbers are growing daily! Plus we continue to spread the word and be a voice for the animals that are unable to speak for themselves!
Okay, I have spilled my guts and no matter how horrific some of the events in my life have been, if I vent I have always been able to move on. This year has not been horrible just some rough personal patches so I have filled up my little bubble and am going to blow all the bad stuff away for good! What is in store for Don’t Fear the Vegan in the future? Let me tell you.
I need to cut back to one recipe a week (which has already happened, I am just telling myself.) I will continue to post interesting things here and on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest, about Veganism, health, animal rights and anything else I think the readers of DFV may enjoy. We (mostly hubby and the little vegan) are trying really hard to get cooking videos made to show just how easy it really is to cook our recipes. I have learned how to use my camera for food photography so the recipes on here will be visually appealing. We are going to move forward with our seitan company, at least locally for now. I am also hoping to start writing the cookbook I have always wanted to write. No time to look back…keep moving forward!!
Thanks to all of you for sharing your journeys, following along and helping us grow. I love the community that we have become and the larger vegan community we are apart of on this amazing world-wide web. Together we are going to do great things!!